it is still you over and over again

 at times i still blame you. 

blame you for ditching me. 

blame you for always giving in to me till the extend i feel that i owned the world. 

blame you for always being so understanding towards me 

and blame you for giving me the type of love that i will never find it from others. 

and here i am, 

suffering because of you. 

at times i wondering why you can give in but he can’t? 

why you can always understand me but he can’t? 

why you can always persuade me but he can’t? 

There you are enjoying every single day of yours and here i am still trying to pick up from where i fell. 

There you’re celebrating an upcoming new life of you and the love of your life but i am here trying to fix all this little pieces back myself. 

I am so so so broken.

but who really knows? 

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to you! 

May all your wishes come true & stay happy as always. 

May your upcoming little baby be healthy too.

Enjoy your big day oh!

😄 

Appreciation

Thankyou. 😊

我好想你哦，真的！

🙃

Need you now

 Picture perfect memories

Scattered all around the floor

Reaching for the phone cause

I can't fight it anymore.

And I wonder if I ever cross your mind.

For me it happens all the time.

It's a quarter after one.

I'm all alone and I need you now.

x

上天啊

难道你看不出我很爱他

怎么明明相爱的两个人

你要拆散他们啊

上天啊

你千万不要偷偷告诉他

在无数夜深人静的夜晚

有个人在想他

以后的日子你要好好照顾他

我不在他身旁你不能欺负他

别再让人走进他心里

最后却又离开他

因为我不愿再看他流泪啦

上天啊

这些晚上我对你说的话

你别不小心漏嘴告诉他

我怕会吵醒他。

x

我放下所有回忆 来成全你的爱情

却始终不愿相信这是命

好久不见的你有点疏离

握手寒暄如此客气

何必要在他的面前刻意

隐瞒我的世界有过你

x

不知不觉钟声响起

你守候在原地 等待着他靠近

温柔的他单膝跪地

钻戒缓缓戴进 你的无名指里

当所有人都替你开心 我却才傻傻清醒

原来我们之间 已没有任何关系

😊

Hiraeth

 So much to say , so much to feel. 

am so drained ; mentally drained.

hope for a shoulder to lean, for me to spill out all my unhappiness & to make me feel better again.

what else can i do to make things better? is this how it suppose to be? i wondered. 

show me the light through the darkness.

why?  

no more tears left & i hope for the best. 

one day, 

he asked : how? 

i answered : because of love, because of understanding. 

he asked : how? 

i answered : he love me hence he don’t mind the little mistakes i made, because to him it wasn’t a mistake it was just who i am. 

he asked : why? 

i answered : because we were busy creating more beautiful moments together than finding faults with each other. 

he asked : why? 

i answered: people that truly love you, will see the flaws in you & still find it cute. people that love themselves more than you will only keep finding ways to make you be like them. 

& 

true enough, it wasn’t because there is no love but because the love is so strong that we rather compromise & go along with each other than finding little faults that leads to arguments. 

this is what i call love

 & 

that’s when i realised , i will never love anyone the same way ever again. 

how long more do i have to perceive to be better? 

how long more do i have to wait to be better?

how many more nights do i’ve to sob just to be better?

&

how many more lies do i’ve to tell myself to be better?

🙁

till then x 

if it’s meant to be, it will be.

 

dear me, 

it is okay to be feeling this way 

it is ok to cry, this is just you trying to be strong. 

you’re stronger than what you expect 

nothing & no one is capable to pull you down. 

hang in there, you’re almost there. 

One day, 

you’re going to look back, smile & say 

“you did it” 

💜 

“if it’s meant to be, it will be”

👋 goodbye 

😊

is it just me or....?

"it’s not the goodbye that hurts, but the flashbacks that follow"

still get those random flashback out of nowhere. 

-

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at least, we loved each other deeply before & i guess that’s enough. (: 

-

-

-

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"we are all addicted to something that ruins us"

& i guess that’s what we call love? 

we will always forgive & forget ones mistakes easily. 

-

-

-

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i hope one day, i will not have to feel so much for you anymore again. 

-

-

-

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‘sometimes, happy memories hurt the most'

-

-

-

-

why? 

till here then, goodnight x