Glad to talk to him for that few mins!! It feels like we are back to those time where we first know each other, but the only things that was different was that we actually know each other more than anyone do.
Those fast replies and those stay on each other chat to reply. Do you miss that shit? Cos i do!!
At times i still wondering how he is doing and how is things going on for him. I wish we were still together to get through everything together, but well, i know it is not possible anymore. (:
I’m glad that he is doing fine anyway. And is doing extremely good without me nagging him.
I almost teared when he said “NO NO AH” & “idiot”! This were the texts that we will always use on each other when we text. Hmm....
I controlled my tears from dropping out, and that’s when i realise i still haven’t fully let go of this rls & him despite telling everyone “i get over liao lo, i ok already, if he now walk beside another girl, i also won’t feel anything alr” HAHAHA, but i guess that’s only just words to cover up my real feelings? I’m just deceiving myself. And how is it a 3 years rls can say let go jiu let go leh? Maybe the feelings is not as strong as before? Maybe the feelings is fading away, maybe i won’t feel so much anymore but well, there is still some feelings laying somewhere in my heart.
And i wonder..... he still love me? he get over me already? HAHAHA, but i doubt that’s important anymore? All i want was just him being happy, do what he really wants and just be the old junyang i once knew.
Honestly, i slowly forget the scent of his shirt, the smell on his face n the touch of his hand. i rem there is one time he randomly tells me “bb actually hor i like it when u will smell my hand when i hug you or bla bla” Keke. I miss that shit too. (‘:
We are too comfortable in every single way. We can fart in front of each other and yet still loving each other. We can shit in front of each other and joke about it. We can embrace each other flaws like my body scars and his acne and still loving each other so deeply. omg, this is the best love i ever had i swear. Now think back, i also find myself the happiest girl on earth. But it is so sad to remember that, i won’t be the last girl that he will be holding hands with, to sleep with and wake up at. I won’t be the girl that will be there for him 24/7 and knowing every single shits he is going through.
Despite always being angry at whatever shits he did, the love for him is always there....just there waiting for him to hold it. It is such a pity that we are over now but i’m also glad at the same time that he is doing good without me.
Things wouldn't be in this state too if I gave him more space and understand him more.(':
It is a pleasure to know him and have him as my boyfriend for this 3 yesrs. It was never easy but it is all worth it. (: I'm glad that he entered my life and taught me such a wonderful lesson . I hope the next one will be better to him and treat him even better..
I guess I will write in again whenever I miss him. Keke. Till we see each other again my dear.
No matter who I'm with, or where I will be, deep down i wish him all the best. Till then. (:
