Hi!
I hope you're still reading my blog up till now. And I know now I'm nobody to say anything to you but hope you can still listen to what I want to say. Sooner or later I won't be blogging this much because I know I have to move on and let go of everything about us.
Well, things may seem very dark very blurry to you but I still believe in you that you will succeed one day. Don't let me down and don't let those people who really care and love you down too Please dont become a fuck boy that hurt girls and don't always bring different girls home. It is not nice and it won't be good too. I know you're under alot of stress and you don't know what else to do. Just take things easy , step by step ok. Everything happened for a reason this is what we all know how to say.
If you really love this girl, I hope you can talk things out w mama and papa nicely. Yknow mama sayang you a lot right? Don't break her heart because of a girl that you knew not long ago. And honestly if a girl really love you she will not put you in difficult position. Ok rls aside, I know waking up is not easy for you, I know the struggle is real. Actually recently i don't know why I also can't wake up in the morning. Like I can't even hear my own alarm ringing and y'know I set alot of alarm too. HAHA. and then when I overslept I felt angry and pekcek at myself too and well I understand how you feel la. but that's not an excuse for you to not going to work oh. I'm glad that you're somehow doing well at this interior design company and I hope you will do something proud from there even though the one that will be accompanying you to celebrate this joyous moment is no longer me but I will still feel really really happy of you. I remembered when you passed your driving licence, I was really really proud and happy for you, the happiness is not something I can describe but it just seems like it is me who passed that kind of feelings. well, whatever things about you affects me la.
Ok, and then the most irritating part that you don't want to listen and read but just hang on with me la, long long one time only, I won't always everyday niam u alr. Your car! Hmmm... I know it is not gonna be easy for you to stay apart from your darling xiao mad and in fact it makes me sad too to know that xiaomad gna be gone soon. I see xiaomad ever since it was bought. From tall to short from plain to some decoration and from nth to something hehe. I invest quite alot in this naughty girl too and I do have feelings too. I rem there is one time I accp u to go do tires and I got so curious about changing tire etc and both of us just stood there and see the uncle take out pump air n put back. HAHAHA. Think back abit funny! Ok back to topic, yea so xiaomad sooner or later will be letting go, I hope you will be prepared and you will really just give in to wtv happened. I know it is not gonna be easy for you, I know you love cars alot but sometimes we have to let go of something, to received another big thing. Like what i told you before we broke up, sell away first wait till we save enough money we will go buy a car ourselves. Now what you really need to focus is on your work first before anything. You this silly boy, one things haven't settle u invite another problem for yourself.
Trust me when I said alot of people care and love you. Is just that right now at this moment you just lost in your own world and you reject to see and feel the love from others and one of them is me, this controlling and paranoid ex girlf of yours. It warms my heart when I knew you said you misses me, me too. But memories will always stay as memories and it will never be the same again after all the things we had said and done. (:
没有车并不代表什么，可是你失去了太多太多东西应为车就真的是错了。 不要为了一时的喜欢而放弃身边真心爱你的人。Car don't have you can buy it again, Madeline don't have you can find another one BUT family don't have you won't have another mrs xian xiuyu, mr lim xin ya n lim peiling. 不要等到有一天你真的清醒了之后，你的家人离开了，你才后悔 okay? Silly boy, jiayou and I hope to see you succeed and trust me I will be behind you, and jumping and cheering for you like how I always did. I hope you won't hate me for saying all this..... Because I really don't want to see you like this 知道吗？
Actually seeing video and photos of both of you, no longer hurts me, in fact I'm glad that you can let go of me so soon, which makes me realise I'm not that good afterall and that I can be replaced so easily. At first my heart ache badly when I knew about you and those girls but after that, I got used to it and it is also this kind of things that will makes me forget you faster. As I said on top, I will not write much over here and about you already because I really have to let go of you and the feelings just so to be fair for him.
And ohyea... Guess what's the date today? HAHAHA. 3 years 4 months lo!!! but sadly, it is no longer me oh. hehe.
Okay la, hope whatever I said earlier on you can absorb in and then yea. Stay happy and let's find our own happiness. (:
