Thankful

Hellu !!!

wassup heheh, it had been long since i blog with a different kind of feelings. 

I dont know how to explain or put it in words but i just feels that it is different from the usual day that i blog. 

usually i will blog with a heavy heart and each and every time it will just put me to bed crying. but this time round i guess i i’ll just smile to bed or probably just toh cos i am freaking sleepy alr. but well, i sleepy until 很舍得. 

that is something that i would do for someone that mean something to me. I mean those that know me know that i am a very sleepy person i get tired and sleepy very easily. you know who you are oh! don’t am chio. 

i will never forget those letters that i had wrote for you; i felt touched when i open the drawer and i saw those hand written letters like i don’t even remember i wrote all this to you but you still keep it properly together with the poloriod. I really didn’t expect it at all and thank you for not making me feel that i have been replaced. 

when we was talking that night with you right beside me and we talked about the reasons on why we landed up where we are today, it feels so weird but i felt relieved. 

relieve that i m still right there in your heart probably not as deep already but i am more than happy. thank you for not making me feel a lil unhappiness when i ask you so many qns on ‘who got this and that’ etc. actually when i am asking, my heart was like ‘Pls pls just say it is just yours and yours even a simple lie i also will accept just don’t say is from others will do’ PHEW thanks god. 

hehehe! 

i cont tomorrow my eyes shutting down alr. goodnight 

What do you think?

   Hello people x 

       CB DAY .......I lost count of which day it was alr. 

   But um, so far everything was good. Quite productive recently, got my room repaint and packed the whole room and rearrange those furniture in da room. 

Put up all the fairy lights and it makes me have a better sleep. Heh. Oh n not to forget, cooked dinner for the fam. My specialty fried rice. (':

I am just gna share some meaningful quotes to myself. 

Also a gentle reminder to myself. 

* "We were meant to be together but we did it wrong" *

deep down I wish that it had never be wrong. Even if it was really wrong I would want to make it right if time could rewind. But nope. So the only option is to continue walking forward and flip this chapter.  

*What comes easy won't last, what last won't come easy*

 Yasss, nothing is easy. (':

If it was easy, it ain't anything either. Humans are contradicting so am I. 

*"When someone is willing to struggle with you, just so that they can build with you, that's love*

Love don't comes easy and when it comes, it is also not easy to hold it despite how much you tried holding on. 

But I also believe if someone were to leave you to become a better person, that's also a love. A love that is beneath it and it is even more beautiful than any other thing. 

*"I changed my thinking. It changed my life"*

Alot of times, I have been a follower, and it is time to change and have my own thinking, and I realise it changed my life too. Be it good or bad, at least I know that was what I wanted at that point of time. 

*"In the blink of an eye it could all be taken away"*

Nothing is irreplaceable, even love. 

Have you ever thought that, you were the one for someone else and out of sudden, it just wasn't you anymore and it will not be anymore. And as years passes, you are still living well and slowly forgetting about the unhappiness and move on. But of course, the starting point of the changes, everybody will tends to be uncomfortable about it and somehow you just kept telling yourself no I can't forget about it, this is my love, this is what I wanted, I had done so much and I can't just lose this, but when you're really left with no other choice, and you have to leave, you will learn that, no one is ever irreplaceable, including you yourself. That's sad but that's true. So I am grateful for everything that have happened be it good or bad because I learned, I growed and I get used to it. 

*"He put me through hell and I called it love."*

Such a meaningful sentence. You will still love this person till the extend whatever wrong he had done or whatever hurt and demaged had been brought to you, it was nothing and you can still forgive him again and again hoping for the best to happen. 

It was because love makes you do everything that is insane and do anything that you didn't expect. That's how powerful love is and I am amazed by it too. Never thought that I would love someone this much till the extend, I don't wish for anything anymore but just him, being happy like before and finally to do something which he had always wanted to. It just wasnt his fault for this ending but it was me who wasn't good enough for him because I did not make a good girlfriend back then. 

*" You never realized how wrong you are until bring strong Is the only choice you have "* 

Yas, no girls like to be strong because it is really tiring but at some time of point you have no choice but to be strong no matter what crashes right in front of you. At some point of time you knew that you can't just breakdown and you can't just show a face so you just have to act like it doesn't bother you and you're not even affected at all. That's how strong you are until you are alone on the bed switching off all lights, and everybody is asleep, the true self will reveal and you just gotta cry every sadness and broken pieces out of your heart and when you're done, you just fall asleep and the next morning, you have to be strong again. (':

I strongly believe true love true friends true people don't fade away easily but when it do, it ain't real anymore. Time will prove everything and I believe time will bring me to where I really belong. Nobody to force it nobody to say it but time will bring us to where we belong , just one fine day. I am waiting for this to happen and when it happened, I believed I will be the most happiest lady on Earth. ❤️ Thankful for everything.